the elevator pitch

talking to the top

Stephen Colbert Is Not a Straight Man

Published January 18th, 2009 in Uncategorized | No Comments »

The Colbert ReportMon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Anthony Romero

Have you noticed openly gay men are the only ones who can fluster Stephen Colbert? Anthony Romero of the ACLU got the host of the Colbert Report to clam up recently. And you do remember how Dan Savage turned Colbert red-faced a few months ago with the mere mention of oily gay sex.

Nine out of 10 of Colbert’s guests fall easily into the role of his foil. That one out of 10, though, man do they seem to get Colbert’s back up. This observation brings us to this week’s Have You Heard: Have you heard Stephen Colbert is not a straight man.

And, yes, there is something wrong with that.

Colbert’s job is to always be funnier than the other guy. But whenever a fellow with a certain amount of, shall we say, panache enters the room, the hero of late-night hipster viewers crumbles like Heath Ledger holding Jake Gyllenhaal’s shirt.

Could it be that Colbert is living a lie? He’s supposedly a family man from the south playing the role of a conservative family man from the south with dim wits.

Could it be a façade? Could Colbert really be just another intellectual heterosexual man who wants to be liberal-minded but reverts to redneckiness when propositioned by a horny member of the same sex? Do gay men carry the rock that contains the Kryptonite to Colbert’s humor?

(more…)

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

Stephen Colbert Put on Notice

Published January 2nd, 2009 in PR Stunts | 1 Comment »

 


 The Colbert Report
ThreatDown – Happiness

 

Are we a greater threat than happiness? Sadly, yes.

Resolutions are like wars: You can choose to win a small battle (drop a waistline inch or two) or you can aim to take it all (go Schwarzenneger on your abs). At The Elevator Pitch, we go big or we go to the bar. That’s why our resolution for 2009 is to get ourselves mentioned on the biggest show on late night television that doesn’t appear on basic cable, doesn’t include a disclaimer about nudity and extreme violence, and isn’t hosted by Jon Stewart. The Colbert Report: we want you to want us to know that you know we exist.

It’s a blatant ploy to get rich. Stephen Colbert acknowledges our presence, you say what’s up with that, you come visit, you tell your friends to come visit, they tell their friends, and so on, until we can spin all that attention into credit default swaps and sell them to what’s left of Iceland.

We will not relent until The Colbert Report recognizes us as a threat, or friend of the show, or thing to put on notice, or just throws us a bone, and not necessarily the femur, either; we’ll take a knuckle or the cartilage about the ear. So, come on, Stephen, just four words: “The Elevator Pitch [and verb of your choice].”

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post